hmm seems to have some problem with my msn... dunno lah. maybe everyone is just ignoring me? haha. i hope not!well. came back frm c3 retreat today... desaru was a nice place i guess... well of course the last night was not so nice but the rest of it was great. ok lah. i dunno. had a talk with darren and well i know what im going to do now just tt well. i dunno lah. i hope that i dont hurt her. dunno la actually. i think im obsessed. i need to get it out of my head but it just doesnt and i dunno!!!! crap lah. no hope ok girl.just give up!!! anyway im like pretty burnt now. and dunno lah. i dun think tt i really did any bonding or what lah but it was ok. hmm. i guess i did acheive my goals lah :) thats a good thing... right?

and well. i can still remember when i first heard the news that she was ill. i was studying with zy in the library and when darren called to tell me i really felt like crying. and yst when she passed away, i couldnt hold them back. not so much because i knew her or anything (cos i dont), just the mourning with a dearly loved and respected pastor in his time of grief and for his children who are so young. and well. i dunno lah. alot of faiths will be challenged because of this i think but God, God will show Himself through this, im sure of it! im just worried i guess for those who cannot accept that maybe it was God's will. esp the younger ones. i just hope that He will grant all of us leaders the words and sensitivity to help them understand... actually i dont really understand myself... Lord please show Yourself! and i mourned with those who were closer to him and who felt it so much more than i did. dunno lah. sad things happen but i hope that yah. we will all unite tgt behind uncle kk and support him, not bring him down.

please please cheer up

thanks to tim and es for coming to cheer me up else i would have spent the rest of the night crying in an empty room